This phrase has been on my mind lately, and so of course I had to look up the etiology (is that the right word?) of this phrase . . . pretty humorous, I guess. Kind of like these eighties shoes I spotted at the MOA last week . . .

But the reality? not so humorous. and I don’t know, I just don’t know, what to do with myself in the meantime.

do I try to play the “good” daughter, just to make him feel good?

do I pretend it isn’t happening?

do I pretend that all of the other stuff never happened?

does it even matter, when family 2.0 has completely supplanted any role I might have had?

and with all of that . . . why do I still feel like a bad daughter?!

but I know why.

it’s because she will think of me as such.

and yet . . . I still can’t bring myself to do the one thing that will at least partially redeem me . . .

because really? I don’t have anything else that I really need to say.

so maybe I am the worst daughter ever.

or maybe I just need to wait in silence for that other shoe to drop.